But say a prayer to pray for the other ones.
At Christmas time, it’s hard but while you’re having fun,
There’s a world outside your window, and it’s a world of dread and fear
Where a kiss of love can kill you, and there’s death in every tear,
And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of doom.
Well, tonight, thank God it’s them instead of you.
– “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” – Band-Aid

I am not surviving. I am at my wit’s end…or half of it!

I am so depressed by the election and by hypocrisy? And those poor souls in Syria. The world is a horror…starting with the frightening, clueless politicians. Namely the ones represented by an elephant symbol. What did elephants do to deserve THAT indignity? And why are we all just waiting around for the next surprise?

Some days I feel like the world hasn’t evolved one itty bit. I hated every second of public school. My mom always was negative with me; too many people chronically lack the ability to offer a kind word in the most obvious of moments. Yep, my mom had a very odd way of even issuing the occasional compliment. I did not realize it at the time; I thought she was wonderful…until I didn’t? Smart alecks pretty much turn me off…way off. In that way, I am like my dad. Absolutely. So, now I just stay away from the snide types…or go to sleep … or watch TV…or adore my pets even more. (Except when the cat jumps into the toilet which happened for the second time this week. She thinks the lid is down, and she cannot get out…arghhhhh!)

Occasionally, these days, I get a vote of confidence from someone somewhere, maybe they are nearby, but more often they live far away in a big city. It’s a comfort, but it also reminds me about how isolated I too often feel. I hope I can hang on to what is left of my sanity. I have been crying daily; today my eyes are even swollen. And my computer is in a room as cold as a meat locker. Have a great holiday season…mine already sucks.

Wow, how I wish I could impart my thoughts to somebody other than my cat. So, I’ll just soldier on and ache inside as usual. No wonder I look so damned old. Probably just as well that I shut up now. No wonder I write. I have absolutely nobody to talk to or listen to – the art of conversation is totally dead and has been for some long time now.

Love you readers; THANKS for making me feel normal. It is rare that I do…and even rarer that somebody makes me feel so.

It’s Christmas time, there’s no need to be afraid.
At Christmas time, we let in light and we banish shade.
And in our world of plenty, we can spread a smile of joy.
Throw your arms around the world at Christmas time.
– “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” – Band-Aid

Thanks for these kind words…

Kim Elizabeth Johnson: “I agree, Susie! It’s so hard waking up every day right now – glad to be alive until the reality kicks in…it’s like living in some sci-fi world where everything and everybody has lost their minds. Thanks for sharing with us…that’s your gift to give! Hang in there – we need you!”